There are a lot of “weird” kinks I’ve happily admitted to enjoying, but it’s interesting how after all these years of spilling my kinky guts onto the internet, there are still some psychosexual proclivities I can’t talk about without some degree of embarrassment or shame. Financial domination and sugar daddies are a couple of them.
There is a difference, incase you were wondering, although it’s less of a “column A and column B” situation and more of a Venn diagram. A sugar daddy (or whatever other sugary moniker you prefer to use for them) is a person who spoils their sugar baby with gifts and/or cash, and usually wields the power in that scenario; financial domination, on the other hand, puts the power squarely in the hands of the person being spoiled, to decide exactly how their financial submissive (a.k.a. “finsub” or, more colorfully, “paypig”) will spoil them, and how much money they’ll spend.
The center of the Venn diagram between these two kinks is where the power dynamic gets a little murky, and it’s the manifestation of money kink that I’ve always been most interested in. Having had an actual sugar daddy for a while, who materialized from the depths of the internet wanting to send me a monthly allowance and buy me pricey sex toys in exchange for risqué conversations by phone and text, I knew that the “normal” configuration of a sugar relationship wasn’t quite up my alley. Though I am very submissive sexually, having a sugar daddy crept into nonsexual territory for me, and with this particular partner, that didn’t feel like a good fit – I found myself rolling my eyes in annoyance at him more than I ever rolled my eyes back in pleasure.
When your sugar daddy calls the shots, you’re also relying on someone else to make decisions about what kinds of gifts you need/get/deserve, and that’s… not ideal, especially when you’re a femme with a lot of opinions about handbags and shoes and your sugar daddy is a man and knows comparatively little about these things. It’s not that I’d be ungrateful if he bought me something that wasn’t precisely to my taste; it’s just that I’d be thinking wistfully about how much further that same money could’ve gone if only I’d been in charge of how it was spent.