As I waited in an interminable customs line at the airport a couple days ago, I did the same thing I always do, because I am an anxious mess: I mentally rehearsed my answers to the questions they'd be likely to ask. I didn’t want to make a fool of myself by misspeaking or stumbling over my words when I got to the front.
Usually, I'm only asked to tell them my profession, so I keep it vague – “I'm a writer and podcaster” – but I knew, in this case, that I'd have to talk about sex toys, because the main reason for this trip is that I'm speaking on a panel about the Magic Wand vibrator at the Museum of Sex on Monday. (You are welcome to come, should you be in the area!)
In the end, I just told the guy I was attending a professional event, and when he asked for clarification, I explained it's an event commemorating a historical vibrator. He seemed hesitant to inquire further, and promptly let me through. But the whole thing got me pondering a question again that I've pondered before: Is "sex toys" really the best and most accurate term for the category of objects it describes? Or should we instead adopt a less playful, more neutral term, like “sex tools,” “sex products,” “sex utensils” or “sex implements”?
I've witnessed many a lively discussion between sex educators, sex workers, and other sex nerds about this, so I feel qualified to present the main arguments on both sides.