In my communities of sex-positive kinky nerds, it’s often bemoaned that there aren’t enough terms for sex acts that actually sound sexy. (Do I want you to go down on me? Yes. Do I want you to “eat my pussy,” “munch my box,” or go for a “muff dive”? Preferably not.)
However, as erotica writers and phone sex operators can attest, there are a lot of sexual terms out there, and the well-known ones have usually stuck around for a reason – that reason being, there are people out there who find it appealing.
I think oftentimes these terms start to take on certain cultural meanings, through which their more literal meanings are filtered. Picture someone who calls cum “semen”; now picture someone who exclusively calls it “spunk.” You probably imagined pretty different people. I think our perceptions of what “kind of person” would use a term can influence our own feelings on sexual vocab more than we realize. We absorb these meanings through media, conversation, and observation, over many years, perhaps not even consciously.
All this to say: A person’s preferences, when it comes to sexual language, are very much informed by their personal history, background, the types of media they consume, the places they hang out online (or don’t), and so on. So I’m sure you can understand why the following ranked list of terms for reaching orgasm is based solely on my own subjective opinion, and is not meant to be a pronouncement on anyone else using these terms. If a sexual word or phrase turns you on or otherwise delights you, please go forth and use it! I’m just in the mood to examine my own linguistic biases today, I guess. Let’s start with my least faves and work our way up.